October 3rd/2013-Chapters 4&5

CYCLE OF RENEWAL1. Go for It2. Doldrums3. Cocooning4. Getting Ready---Cycle repeats with each goal or phase in their life.PHASE 1: GO FOR IT- Positive part of a life chapter- Person has focus and an excitement about starting something newPHASE 2: DOLDRUMS- Client experiences a sense of decline- Client is unhappy with the situation but the are not sure what to do about it- This phase is good for restructuring life so it works againMINI-TRANSITION- mini-transitions sometimes happen when people are ready for change-clients will sometimes return to phase 1 during this time-this time can come with "mid-life crises" that can lead to unhealthy life choicesPHASE 3: COCOONING- Client detaches from a life chapter that wasn't working- This is the beginning of a major life transition- Client will often take time to heal, reflect, discover new directions, etc.- This phase can include: sabbatical, extended vacation, 1/2 day retreats, etc.----set timelines for at risk clients of depression etc....keep journalling and accountability throughout this time to be aware of triggers and keep from taking a bad turnPHASE 4: GET READY- Client starts experimenting with behavior/actions, networking, training for new ventures, etc.- Client is ready to take what they have learned and put it into practice- Client is ready to take risksTransition always requires a combination of holding on and letting go.

EMPOWERMENTDEFINITION - Helping people increase their strength------Personal------Interpersonal------Socioeconomic------Political- Helping people develop influence toward improving their circumstancesWHEN TO EMPOWER- Empower clients when....---They encounter an obstacle---The client discounts a resource or skill that can change their situation and or help them reach their goal---The client sees their strength as a weakness---The goal seems unattainable---The client has forgotten their vision---The client needs an advocate---The client has negative self-talksEmpowering clients (secular) to search for truth will allow God to reveal himself to them, without us having to mention Christ, our faith or to go against any "governmental" mandates against religion in the workplace. Pray as well for your session and the person.  EMPOWERING CONVERSATIONS:Sharing---Whats going on "in the moment"---Intentional, authentic communication---Life coach needs to listen with purposeDebriefing---What has been done since last session---Detailed report on activities etc., since last session---Allows client to learn from their recent history-What worked-What didn't work-Forgive their own mistakes-Set or shift goalsClearing---Anything that may be standing in the clients way of moving forwardDiscussion and Debate---Use dialogue---Helps the client think through ideas without feeling pressured or in danger of being put down(Discussion of identity and knowledge of --transition from egocentric self to independent self, an understanding that your decision are your own and deal intently with IDENTITY)---Purpose of discussion is to empower client to think at a deeper levelTeaching---Providing wisdom and knowledge (ie:breathing techniques, time management skills, etc.)---Be careful not to provide over-direction or undermine partnership with client---Ask yourself-why do I want to share this?-How will sharing this benefit the client?-Will sharing this benefit me?-Will I be offended or hurt if the client refuses the teaching?  Coaching Conversations---Exploring possibilities with clientsSKILLS FOR EMPOWERING PEOPLE   -Focus on persons strengths-Acknowledge and endorse---Stand up for them---Reframing---Perspective---Never make clients wrong---Possibility thinking

STRETCHINGHow to Stretch-Listen fully and affirm------Def.Affirm: to show a strong belief in or dedication to; to say something is true in a confident way-Provide Feedback------summarize what you heard the client say (reframing)-Ask client to think about new possibilities for attaining goal-Ask clients to think of MANY new possibilities------helps move clients out of their comfort zone-Add input for possibilities------helps client kick-start creative process------provide suggestions for possibilities-Provide alternative possibilities------make sure some alternatives are faulty so client can compare and contrast-Provide limited possibilities-Teach a new technique------relaxation------time management-Discuss (offer) only one option------allows client to weigh pros/cons of option independent of other options-Give advice and/or answers------use sparingly------not really coaching unless in the context of feedbackPeople will stretch to try and meet challenges, even if they don't know if they can accomplish it...IF they know someone believes in them. (Ie: TV shows like Amazing Race and The Biggest Loser)Skills For Stretching Clients-Use distinctions------word choice is key-Use metaphors and analogies------most people think in word pictures------Psalms are full of metaphors and analogies-Make big requests------acknowledge the "bigness" of it------identify strengths of client-Identify and name contradictions/inconsistencies-Use a Compassionate Edge

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